just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
