I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
