You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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