just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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