I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
