they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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