He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
