Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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