The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
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Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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