So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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