He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
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He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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