According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize