a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
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