so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize