Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(206): View more from Washington

Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.

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(317): View more from Indiana

we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky

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(815): View more from Illinois

it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..

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(248): View more from Michigan

Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(616): View more from Michigan

I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...

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(828): View more from North Carolina

Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..

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(251): View more from Alabama

Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.

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(858): View more from California

I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild

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(585): View more from New York

His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.

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