I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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