pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
