is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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