I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
