This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize