Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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