No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
