No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
