had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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