im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.