I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
