false alarm. still invincible.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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