The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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