Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
