4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
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