we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
