I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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