kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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