Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize
