Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Randomize