their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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