id be glad to
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
