So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
