I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
