Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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