He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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