garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
