I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Randomize
