Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
