IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
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