He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
