The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
