whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
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