True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize