I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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