Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Randomize
