If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
All the doctor said was why
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize