what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Randomize
